The Runaway Mama’s Guide To Surviving Motherhood – Lesson #673: Do not talk about future birthday parties – especially if the future birthday party is for a sibling – until present birthday parties are over.
This conversation happened in the car the other day on our way home from the grocery store.
Me: “Dylan, are you so excited? Your Avengers birthday party is in two weeks!”
Dylan: “Yes!”
Me: “Avengers Assemble…for Dylan’s birthday!!”
Riley: “My birthday is in a few weeks.”
Me: “Well, in a few months. What kind of birthday party do you want to have, Riley?”
Riley: “A Wonder Pets birthday!”
Really? That show isn’t even on “On Demand” anymore.
Me: “How about a dinosaur party, Riley. Or, what about a Spider-Man party?”
Riley: “Spider-Man!! And I’ll have a really cool Spider-Man cake.”
Wait for it…
Dylan: “But I want a Spider-Man party. And I want a Spider-Man birthday cake.”
Crap.
Me: “But you’re having an Avengers party. You said you wanted an Avengers party and that’s what I’ve been planning.
For weeks!
[Cue the tears.]
Dylan: “But I want Spider-Man and Superman and Batman and Robin.” Then the tears became sobs. “I want all of the super heroes for my birthday.” More crying. “All of them!”
Crap, crap, crap. Think of something, Mama. Think…think…think…
Me: “How about if we do the Avengers for your birthday party and then we’ll do Spider-Man on your actual birthday. We could make Spider-Man cupcakes. How does that sound?”
Silence…but less crying.
Me (cont.): “And do you know what, Dylan?”
Dylan: “What?”
Me: “You get to celebrate your birthday at school, too. What do you want me to bring to school to celebrate your birthday?”
Dylan: “Donuts.”
Donuts?
Crisis averted. Well, except for the part where instead of planning and executing one birthday celebration, we’re doing three.
The Runaway Mama by Jen Gregory 