Category Archives: motherhood

Certified

A few months ago, I received in an invitation to attend a CPR training class at Fort Lauderdale-based One Beat CPR. Wow! How exciting! I’ve always wanted to be on the pulse (pun intended!) of what’s new, hip, and exciting for kids, parents, and especially Mamas. Okay, so it wasn’t an invitation to check out a new kid-friendly gastropub, a family-friendly resort, or a Mama-friendly wine bar, but it didn’t take me long to realize it was a hugely important event to attend. Here’s why.

I have two children, both of whom I’m finally willing to admit I’m responsible for keeping safe and alive, which is no small feat considering these crazy monkeys spend most of their time stumbling toward disaster. I haven’t been to the emergency room (yet) with my kids, but we came pretty close when Riley face planted in the cement after tumbling down a wheelchair ramp a few years ago.

I’ve taken two infant CPR classes – one before each kid was born – and here’s the thing. Within five four three two minutes of leaving each class, I realized I absorbed ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. It was too much information, it was too complicated, there was too much at stake (my baby?), and there was a lot of denial (that will never happen to me). I hope I’m not alone in admitting that I just figured if ever something happened, I’d call 911, which I’ve since learned is foolish. In the best of circumstances, it can take 4-6 life-saving (or life-losing) minutes for emergency responders to arrive.

These days, if my kids are about to jump in the pool or eat food with a statistically higher chance of resulting in choking than, say, ice cream, I go down a comprehensive checklist of protective measures that includes:

  1. “Don’t drown.”
  2. “Don’t choke.”

That’s it. (It’s hardly Mama of the Year material, but at least I’m honest.)

So, when One Beat CPR invited me to their headquarters, I jumped at the chance to brush up on my (totally and completely non-existent) life-saving skills. I’m not going to go into too much detail about CPR technique here, because even though I learned a lot about the steps and procedures involved (in a refreshing and entertaining manner), what struck me as the most important takeaways from the course actually had little to do with steps and procedures. Here goes…

Clinical experience matters. I am head over heels in love with One Beat CPR, and it’s not just because the folks who run it are strong, funny, and handsome firefighter/paramedic/police officers with heroic stories to tell. (But maybe a little bit.) It’s because they started One Beat CPR after personal experiences propelled them to dedicate their lives to making a difference. One Beat CPR’s founder, Lon Rosen, kept his two-week-old – yes, two-week-old – daughter alive by breathing for her when she was rushed to the hospital with a misdiagnosed congenital heart condition. She’s alive today because her father knew how to administer CPR.

One Beat CPR’s mission has nothing to do with a bottom line; rather, it’s deeply personal. The instructors have clinical experience with CPR. In other words, they’ve done real CPR on real people – perfect strangers and loved ones. They confront life and, unfortunately, death every single day. I’m stealing a line from Usher here (I heard him say it on “The Voice”) when I say their hard work is their “heartwork.”

There is no wrong way to do CPR. Brian, our instructor, told us a story of a little girl who fell in her backyard swimming pool. The mother discovered her at the bottom of the pool, dove in to get her, pulled her out of the water, and then ran around the yard screaming like a lunatic. The older brother, around nine years old, who had been inside playing video games, heard the commotion and walked outside. When he saw his sister on the ground, he straddled her and pounded her chest with his fists. Eventually, she coughed water and began breathing.

Nothing about what the boy did to his sister would ever be taught in a CPR class, but he did something (vs. nothing) and he saved her life. In a nutshell, if you’ve watched a couple of seasons of “Grey’s Anatomy” or “CSI: Crime Scene Investigation,” you probably know enough about CPR and/or the Heimlich maneuver to help someone in trouble. Doing something – anything – is better than doing nothing. (And, by the way, in the state of Florida and probably in most other states, there are good Samaritan laws that prevent citizens from being sued for attempting to save a life.)

There is no wrong way to do the Heimlich maneuver either. Brian told us that in ten years of teaching, he’d never met anyone – with or without certification – who failed to save a life with the Heimlich maneuver. Did some of those people do it without proper technique? Yup. Did some of them injure the person in the process? Yup. Did they save a life every single time? You betcha.

There is a standard CPR technique…but, does it matter if you lose count and do 20 compressions instead of 30 or do three breaths instead of two? NO. If you do something, you’re doing it right. Sounds like some excellent Runaway Mama Math to me!

You don’t have to do mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to administer successful CPR. Listen, if it’s your kid, a friend, or a family member, you should probably risk the cooties, but it’s legitimate to be concerned about illness and disease as a result of mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. In fact, it’s the one of the top reasons people decide not to get involved. The good news is that you can administer successful CPR solely with compressions (remember doing something is better than doing nothing), and if you take a training course with One Beat CPR, they’ll give you a special plastic mask in a cute little pouch on a key ring that can be placed over a victim’s mouth so you can administer breaths.

mask

Nifty!

Defibrillators are NOT scary. Although defibrillators look daunting, they’re actually way more user-friendly than the universal remote control in my family room.

defib

Insert dramatic music → HERE

You literally press a button and the machine tells you exactly what to do and how to do it. There are even illustrations. It’s like having a one-on-one conversation with Dr. McDreamy while reading directions to put something together from Ikea. Sort of.

After the two-hour course, I left One Beat CPR with some swag…

swag

…a CPR mask, and the confidence to hopefully not run around my yard like a lunatic should I be faced with an emergency. Am I trolling the streets looking for lives to save? Hell no. But I feel EMPOWERED. I feel like I can do something besides say, “Don’t choke,” and that’s pretty awesome.

I’m certifiable in a lot of ways (my husband will attest to that), but I’m also officially certified in CPR.

certified

What can you do?

Take a CPR class. Find a CPR course taught by people with clinical experience. South Florida folks can contact One Beat CPR. I’ve also been told that One Beat CPR has affiliations with groups just like them all across the country. So even if you’re in Massachusetts or Montana, contact One Beat CPR and they can help put you in touch with someone local to you.

Learn the safety measures in place at your kids’ daycare or school. School’s out, but when your kids go back in the fall, find out about their emergency procedures. Ask if the teachers are certified in CPR. (They’re supposed to be.) Also, find out where your school keeps the defibrillator. (They’re supposed to have one.)

Organize a CPR training session for your school, friends, etc. I often volunteer in my son’s classroom, and there were a few occasions during the year when I was alone with twenty kids eating lunch. What would I have done had something happened under my watch? In the fall, I plan to advocate for a mandatory CPR training course for volunteers.

Who else? Where else? Does your babysitter know CPR? Does the sports organization or park where your kids play soccer (or fill in the blank) have a defibrillator on site? Are the coaches and referees certified in CPR? This summer, my kids are at a day camp with a full-time on-site paramedic. Phew. Don’t be afraid to ask questions and don’t be afraid to demand answers…and change.

Thank you, One Beat CPR!

p.s. Kid-friendly gastropubs, family-friendly resorts, and Mama-friendly wine bars can reach me at therunawaymama (at) gmail (dot) com.

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Filed under emergency, motherhood

The Graduate

What a week!

The convergence of finishing the last week of school, buying and baking teacher gifts, dealing with Terminix (termites having been swarming in my kitchen on and off for two weeks, which has been totally awesome), coping with the stress of summer camp cabin placements, and suffering from some crazy-ass PMS (my apologies) has been about as traumatic as when I went for my 37-week checkup when I was pregnant with Dylan and my doctor told me I had preeclampsia and needed to go straight to the hospital for a c-section, except that Mike and I were supposed to go to his office holiday party that night, I was supposed to get a haircut the next morning, I hadn’t stopped working yet, I’d just eaten a turkey sub (epidural would have to wait 8 hours), I had no bag packed and no birth plan whatsoever, Harry was at Petco getting groomed, and there was a full moon (and thus every Tom, Dick, and Harry was going to have a baby that night).

It. Was. Nuts.

This week has been pretty nutty, too, but in the middle of all the chaos (and PMS-related crying), Dylan, my first baby, graduated from Kindergarten.

diploma

It’s been a monumental year of learning for Dylan.  First and foremost, he learned that recess is the best part of the day.  Less significant (to him, anyway), he learned to read, spell, and add and subtract, and he even knows a little bit about vertices.  That’s right, there’s geometry in the Kindergarten math curriculum.  I predict that I won’t be able to help with his first grade math homework by Thanksgiving.

It’s also been a big year of growing.  Literally.  On graduation morning, I discovered that his pants were a smidge too short.  (Oops.)

dpants

And figuratively.  Dylan has grown this year in ways that will help make him a decent, caring, and giving adult.

A few days ago, Dylan told me about a boy at school who played soccer too rough at recess.  He purposely kicked kids in the legs and threw the ball at Dylan and his friend’s faces.  I said, “That kid sounds like a real piece of…a real piece of…”  I paused for a moment to choose my words wisely when Dylan piped in with, “…shit.  He’s a real piece of shit.”

Isn’t it adorable how we finish each other’s sentences?

Yes, shit is a bad word.  Yes, Dylan said it.  Out loud.  But, we have an understanding.  Helping him recognize the qualities of a good friend – kindness, honesty, trust, empathy, and responsibility – in others and within himself has been backbreaking work this year, and if a little bit of tough (or “shit”) talk helped me get through to him, then so be it.

Dylan had a tough time with one particular boy in his class this year.  I did everything I could to intervene, but no matter what I said or did, Dylan repeatedly made himself vulnerable and got hurt over and over again.  He just didn’t get it.  He didn’t understand that the kid wasn’t a good friend, and it was infuriating!

Let’s face it.  Dylan’s going to encounter mean people at every age and stage of his life.  I’m all grown up (or an “Old Lady” as Riley so lovingly calls me), and I still meet mean people and struggle with friendships – with knowing when they’re authentic (or not), knowing when they’re healthy (or not), and knowing when to hold on to them (or not).

I want to empower Dylan to make smart decisions about with whom he makes friends (and, thankfully, he has some fantastic ones), but that’s a lot for a six-year-old to handle, especially after spending his toddlerhood in an “everyone is your friend” bubble.

A few weeks ago, Dylan came home from school upset because a kid tossed one of his Ninjago swords into the bushes.  I told him that I felt really bad about the situation, but I reminded him that, in the end, he was responsible for his own toys.  I asked him, “Why did you let this kid play with your toys in the first place?”  Silence.  Then crying. “Is this kid a good friend?  Does he care about your feelings?  Does he care if you get hurt?”  More crying.  “Does he care enough about you to be responsible with your toys?  Does he look out for your best interests?”  And more crying.

I lost it.  I said (or perhaps shouted), “Dylan, I have a secret to tell you.  Some people in this world are mean.  I’m all grown up and I meet mean people all the time.  So does Daddy.  It’s sad and it’s disappointing, but some people are just not nice.  Some people are just…they’re just shitty, and this kid at school who threw your toy in the bushes seems like a real shit.  You’re going to meet mean and shitty people all the time, so you have to try your best to surround yourself with nice people who truly care about you.”

Did I go too far?  Probably.  Did I curse a lot?  Yup.  Did I break his innocent little heart?  I think so.  But, did I finally get through to him?  The look on his face told me Y-E-S.

It took almost all of Kindergarten, but Dylan is finally beginning to understand what it means to be a good friend, and I can’t think of a more important lesson for him to carry through his life.

This has been a year chock-full of changes for Dylan, including his pants size!  Fortunately, he’s held on tight to his passion, imagination, and irrevocable ability to live with his big, beautiful, beating heart on his sleeve.  Last year, Dylan announced on his Pre-K graduation video that when he grows up he wants to be a popcorn maker.  (He does love popcorn.)  A year later, he’s a few inches taller, a lot smarter, and gobs wiser, but he’s the same little dreamer, only now he occasionally says “shit,” and per his Kindergarten graduation ceremony slide show, when he grows up he wants to be a sticker book seller.  (He does love sticker books.)

Dream big, Pickle!

m&d

Mama In The Picture!

Off to first grade…

offtofirstgrade

(And off to Pre-K for the little guy…)

Congratulations to all of your graduates – big and small!

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Filed under motherhood, school