Category Archives: shopaholism

September 8, 2010 · 2:24 pm

Rehab 101

I did it. I survived one month of shopaholic rehab. I bought nothing but food, diapers and household essentials for 31 days. Well, except for two situations…

There was one incident where I talked my mom into adding a Kindle cover for me to her amazon.com order. Technically it was a gift, and adding the cover to her order got her free shipping, so it was a win-win situation for everyone, right?

Also, I bought books and puzzles for the kids when we were on vacation. It was the first night we used the resort’s babysitting services and I wanted to give them a surprise for being good with the sitter, and, of course, to ease my guilt for leaving them with one.

I wasn’t flawless, but I think I did a pretty good job of cutting my impulse spending, and I started chipping away at my shopping addition. Here’s what I’ve learned so far:

1.My name is Jen and I’m an emotional shopper. Based on my Google research, this appears to be a real syndrome. The vacation incident I mentioned above is a classic example of how my emotions propel me to shop. This is going to take time to fix, but I’m starting to feel (it’s an actual physical sensation for me) the difference between healthy and unhealthy shopping.

2.I want a lot, but I don’t need a lot. This one is simple. I didn’t buy anything for a month and I’m still alive. I wasn’t seduced by free shipping or buy one get one free offers and I’m okay. Happy, actually. In fact, I’ve spent more time writing, running, reading and, this one’s tough to admit, playing with my kids. As it turns out, wanting (and buying) things I don’t need makes me anxious and unproductive.

3.When I open my closet and think, I have nothing to wear, it has nothing to do with the clothes in my closet. I had one of these emergencies last week. Riley was sick and so clingy that he would’ve crawled back inside me if he could. I had to bring him to the doctor that morning where I knew I would wait for an eternity. (FYI: Actual wait time was an hour and 15 minutes. This should be illegal.) That afternoon, I would be tortured by “Thomas The Train” DVDs, and that evening I would have to leave the kids with a babysitter, with Riley kicking and screaming because of his clinginess, to go to the open house at school where I would juggle meeting with both kids’ teachers because Mike wasn’t going with me. So there I stood in my closet thinking about the day ahead, with Riley hanging on my left leg for dear life, and I couldn’t catch my breath. That was all I needed to declare, I have nothing to wear.

4.Shopping is fun…in moderation. It’s noble to accessorize the same black top and jeans every time you go out, but when it’s your anniversary or your birthday, it’s also nice to wear something that makes you feel special. I look forward to this special occasion shopping. I just have to remind myself that I don’t have to spend $200 at the Gap just because it’s 10% Tuesday.

What’s next? Definitely more rehab, but with a little bit of wiggle room so I can test my new skills. I also want to work on extending what I’m learning to my kids. Riley hasn’t exhibited any shopaholic symptoms yet, but it’s quite possible that Dylan is worse off than me. As I sit here editing this post, Dylan is reading a book and pointing at the pictures saying “I wanna buy that and that and that and that and…” Oy.

To start, we’re going to donate some of our vast collection of toys this fall. I plan to include Dylan in the process to start teaching him the importance of being charitable. I also hope to make Chanukah a holiday of giving instead of receiving. My plan is help the kids pick out a charitable organization and make a small donation in their name. Please don’t call me the Grinch (my husband does!). We celebrate Christmas, too, so the kids will get plenty of presents.

Do you have any tips or ideas to keep kids from turning into shopping addicts? Please share them in the comment space on the blog. I could use all the help I can get! Thanks!

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Filed under Shopaholic Mama, shopaholism, Uncategorized

August 6, 2010 · 9:03 pm

T.G.I.F.

It was a big week, my friends.  Not only was it the first full week of shopaholic rehab, but I also had my first ever colonoscopy.  Good times [insert sarcasm].

I’ll start with rehab.  Here is a summary of the week in dollars.

·Monday: I bought nothing extra at Target (but I really, really wanted to), and I used a coupon!

·Tuesday: $15 co-pay for Dylan at the pediatrician. (Poor little guy has croup and had to stay home from camp until Friday. He’s feeling better now.) Also, I used another coupon at Whole Foods, where I spent a meager $75.06.

·Wednesday: Back to Publix. No shopaholic moments, unless you count the abnormally large quantity of cheese sticks I bought. It’s a popular snack in my house.

·Thursday: Got haircuts for the boys in the morning (a legitimate purchase and they look adorable). Then I went back to Publix for apple juice and ginger ale (for my pre-colonoscopy liquid diet).  After that I spent NO money. I spent the rest of the day in the bathroom.

·Friday: The only thing I bought was a colonoscopy.  It cost $43.90.  The happy drugs they put in my IV before they put me to sleep were priceless.

And now the colonoscopy.

Everything was fine with the actual procedure except for the two and a half long hours I had to wait before going in. The place was like a colonoscopy factory and the line was long.

There was good and bad news with the results.  My doctor found no cancer, but he did find and remove a polyp.  Colon cancer runs in my family, but I am only 34 years old and I already have a polyp. Now, instead of waiting 15 years to do this all over again, it will be five.  Five years is a long time, but it is sobering news, especially since the prep was dreadful.

Speaking of which, drinking the cleanse solution was excruciating.  Half way through it and after I started vomiting, I told my mother-in law, who stayed with me for moral support (my husband couldn’t leave work), that I’d rather have another c-section than ever do this again. There will never be enough time that passes for me to forget how it appalling it was to drink that crap.

On Thursday morning, I told Dylan that he and his brother were going out with Grandpa and Aunt Heather for the afternoon because I had to take medicine that was going to make me not feel good and poop a lot.  Trust me, this is language he truly understands.  I got a little teary when I told him because I was truly dreading the experience, and do you know what he said to me?  He said, “There’s nothing to be afraid of, Mommy.” This is exactly what I would have said to him if the roles were reversed, and I loved him to pieces for saying it to me.

On a lighter note, the silver lining of the whole experience had to be the five pounds I lost during the cleanse.  If I weren’t so cranky, hungry, thirsty and wanting to stay within five feet of the bathroom, today would have been a great day to put on a bikini and go to the beach.  I haven’t been this skinny since my wedding day.

What did I learn this week?

·I’m happier when I spend less money.

·It doesn’t matter how much broccoli and spinach I eat, some things, like polyps, are out of my control.

·My kids saved me this week.  I give them all of the love and care I can muster, and they truly do the same for me.

What’s next for this mama?  First, Chinese food for dinner.  I haven’t eaten anything since Wednesday afternoon.  Next, more shopaholic rehab – three weeks to go!  Then, a much needed family vacation.  We’re off to Hammock Beach with the grandparents for a week.  We could all use the break.  Wait, what break!?  I’m going away with two kids under the age of four!  You’ll hear from me again soon as I attempt to pack everything in the house and fit it all in the back of our car.

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Filed under cancer, colonoscopy, health, shopaholism, shopping, vacation