What A Difference A Day Makes

I often say, “What a difference a year makes,” about my boys as they grow in leaps and bounds leaving babyhood behind.  Today, I can’t help but think, what a difference a day makes.  I don’t know why there’s such a stark difference between September 11th and September 12th, but there just is.  Period.  Yesterday, I was a Sad, Exhausted,Reflective, Irritable and Impatient Mama. Today, I’m a different person.

To start, I’m a Guilty Mama.  (Familiar territory.)  I think I’m a Guilty Mama every Monday morning merely because of the relief I feel after dropping the boys off at school.  For me, Mondays are quiet and peaceful –like Saturdays probably are to most non-parents – and I cherish them.  I’m also a Guilty Mama (and Guilty Wife) today because I selfishly wanted yesterday all to myself to mourn the day, but I made no arrangements to do so and then took my frustration out on the whole family.

Thankfully, I’m a Rested Mama today.  I’ve haven’t slept well in awhile.  Every night has been a new nightmare and every morning has come too early thanks to my little roosters.  Last night, however, the boys went  to sleep before 8pm.  It was 7:41pm to be exact, and I know this because I looked at the clock in awe after we closed the boys’ bedroom door behind us.  Riley actually fell asleep cuddled in my arms on the couch while Dylan sat next to me playing “Cars 2” on the Xbox.  It was a beautiful moment in an otherwise ugly day.  I was in bed and asleep before 9:30pm and slept soundly – except for one wake-up from Harry– until 7am this morning.  (Thank you, Mike, for answering the roosters’ calls.)

I’m a Wet Mama.  I got caught in a soaking rain this morning on my walk and it was glorious. I don’t mean to be dramatic and suggest the rain was some kind of soul cleansing experience, but the truth is that it did feel a little bit like a heavyweight was being washed away.  I remember running a few 5Ks in New York City in the pouring rain and those were the races that felt like the biggest accomplishments.  There was no 5K today, but my mind was racing and the rain forced it to stop.  For the first time in a long while, I felt 100% present in the moment.  I was wet and happy, and I wasn’t thinking about (or worrying about) anything except how funny it was to look up and see blue sky even in the pouring rain.

Finally, I’m a Laundry Mama.  Everyone’s sheets are getting washed today and that alone is a fresh start to the day and the week ahead.  I’m getting a haircut tomorrow, I havea girls’ night out on Thursday, and the winners of the CBS Miami Most Valuable Blogger Awards will be announced on Friday.  (Thanks again to everyone who voted!) 

There’s plenty to worry about.  The world is filled with hate, Dylan still won’t eat new food, and Riley might lose his two front teeth, but at least it’s September 12th.  What a difference a day makes.  

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Filed under anxiety, bad dreams, Guilty Mama, September 11th

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