It’s Wednesday and you know what that means. It’s time for some Runaway Mama math! Go ahead and give it a try. I promise it’s easier than the Kindergarten math homework Dylan brings home from school.
Q: How long does it take for a sparkling clean house to look and feel like it was never cleaned at all?
A: In my house it takes about 10 minutes. I cherish all 600 seconds.
Q: A local bar & grill has an arcade. How much money is required for the Runaway Mama to enjoy her meal without enduring whining, crying, fighting, and/or repeated trips to the bathroom (with Riley) to “see the new toilet.”
A: Approximately $20. This is a lot of money and I feel bad about how much I gave them. I’m also surprised at how much cash I actually had in my wallet. I blame it on the cough syrup with codeine that clearly impaired my judgment, but at least they won some prizes. Indeed! We are the proud owners of eighteen colorful, useless (and will be missing within an hour) bouncy balls.
Q: On Sunday, the Runaway Mama bakes one batch of chocolate chip cookies and two batches of brownies (for a bake sale at school), plants four pots of flowers, waters one lawn (sprinkler system is currently “out of order”), does three loads of laundry and three loads of dishes, referees 583 fights between brothers, collates 20 letters and envelopes (also for school), and cleans 927 messes that spontaneously appear every time she blinks. At what time does the Runaway Mama pour herself a glass of wine?
A: 4:30 p.m.
Editor’s Note: Except for the bronchitis, it was a nice holiday weekend. That is, until Sunday when we were all totally and completely sick of each other. How was your Thanksgiving?
The Runaway Mama by Jen Gregory 