In case you’re wondering how my morning went today, here are some of the zingers I said to my kids before school and the awards I earned for saying them.
Most (Un)Original: “You get what you get and you don’t get upset.”
Most Rhetorical: “Why do we go through this every single morning?”
Most Truthful: “I ask so little of you!”
Most Paranoid: “Why do you treat me this way?”
Most Ridiculous: “You’re lucky you live in this house and not some other house!”
Most Profound: “Sometimes we have to do things we don’t want to do.”
Most Regretful: “Get your shit together!”
Most Desperate: “Why does this have to be so hard?”
Most Aha-Moment Worthy: “None of this is going to change, so you have to change your attitude.”
And my personal favorite…
Most Like Something Lloyd Dobbler Would Say: “Can’t you just be happy? Just decide to be happy and be happy.”
Remember the scene in “Say Anything” when Lloyd Dobbler says to his sister, “Why can’t you be in a good mood? How hard is it to decide to be in a good mood and be in a good mood once in a while?” Thoroughly irritated and with fire in her eyes, she responds, “Gee, it’s easy.”
Just like parenting.
The Runaway Mama by Jen Gregory 
hahahahahaha! And congratulations! Those trophies are going to look SO GOOD in your new house.
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Love this! I actually spend an awful lot of time talking to my students like this.
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How the HECK do you keep getting FUNNIER???
Very JELLY.
My morning is a blur…but I suspect I won some choice awards too.
Thanks and love,
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If I didn’t laugh, I’d cry?? Funny is definitely my sweet spot. The thing is, I can’t make it happen. It happens to me. So now I wait for it to possess me again.
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Agreed.
My blog is where I found out I could be funny.
But you are getting Hilarious.
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