Category Archives: conversations to remember

Are You Smarter Than Your Five-Year-Old?

Do you remember the game show, “Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader?” where adult contestants competed against fifth-graders to see who knew more answers to questions from elementary school text books?  I have an idea for a game show called, “Are You Smarter Than Your Five-Year-Old?” but it’s flawed because the five-year-old will win every time.  Case in point:

Mike:  “Where did you get that cool motorcycle?”

Dylan:  “I got it at the dentist because I was crying.  They like it when you cry.”

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Shorts

“Mommy, so-and-so has the biggest house.”

“How do you know she has the biggest house if you’ve never been there.”

“She told me she has the biggest house.”

Lovely.  “Dylan, it doesn’t matter how big your house is.  What matters is that you’re surrounded by friends and family who love and adore you.  That will always bemore important than the size of your house.”

“Mommy, I’m the lover of everyone.”

~

“Mommy, how many things are in the garage?”

“A lot.”

“A thousand?”

“Probably a million.  We should clean it.  Will you help me clean out the garage this weekend?”

Silence.  “Dylan, do you know what an allowance is?”

“What?”

“It’s money you earn for helping out around the house.  If you help me clean out the garage this weekend, I’ll give you a dollar. Actually, it’s a pretty big job. If you help me, I’ll give you five dollars.”

“How about you give me twenty.”

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