October 18, 2011 · 5:10 pm

PSA

Coping with infertility is hard enough, but being diagnosed with breast cancer in the process is unimaginable.  In case you missed it, Giuliana Rancic, “E! News” host, reality show star and wife of “The Apprentice” winner Bill Rancic, announced on the “Today Show” yesterday that she has early-stage breast cancer. She found out as a result of a mammogram that her fertility doctor insisted she receive before undergoing her third IVF treatment.  All she wanted was a baby, but she got cancer instead, and now she has to put IVF on hold to undergo breast cancer treatment.  Now that’s a tough pill to swallow.

My heart goes out to her.  As you may know, my first pregnancy ended up being a bunch of cancer cells floating around my uterus.  I had to undergo chemotherapy injections and then wait a (very long) year before I could try again.  It’s hard to think about it now – when my life so clearly revolves around my children – but there was a time when I didn’t think I would ever be a mother. 

I’m reminded of the CT Scan technician who scanned my body to see if the cancer in my uterus had spread.  He told me his daughter had a molar pregnancy and went on to have three healthy children.  He said, “Don’t worry you’ll have babies.”  I didn’t believe him.  In fact, I thought he was a nutty old man and I wondered if he was qualified to do something as important as checking my brain, lungs, and liver for cancer. It turns out he was right (and plenty qualified).  I wouldn’t presume to give Giuliana advice or tell her everything is going to be okay, but I would say this: If you can envision yourself as a mother, it will happen one way or another.

On the “Today” Show, Giuliana said she never would have had a mammogram if it weren’t for her doctor’s insistence.  She has no family history of breast cancer, and the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists recommends women start having routine mammograms at age 40. (She’s 36.)  Had she not ended up under this particular doctor’s care, she would have missed the early diagnosis and her ultimate prognosis might have been much worse when she eventually had a mammogram four or five years later.  Amazingly, her pursuit of motherhood may have saved her life. 

I applaud Giuliana for sharing her story so honestly, and I hope her experience encourages women to become stronger advocates for their health.  I had a mammogram last year.  I was 35.  I don’t have a family history, but I do have cancer paranoia.  (Molar pregnancy + colonpolyp + removal of numerous pre-cancerous birth marks and moles = Paranoid Mama)  I wanted a mammogram and my doctor listened to my concerns and made it happen.   

Here’s the public service announcement portion of this post: October is Breast Cancer and Domestic Violence Awareness Month.  My thoughts about both issues are the same.  Trust your instinct, listen to your body, take care of yourself, and get the medical care and services you want and deserve.

And one more thing… For any readers with teenagers at home, Liz Claiborne has a wonderful domestic violence awareness and education campaign called Love Is Not Abuse.  (Disclaimer:  I worked for the campaign in my Pre-Mama years.)  They recently launched a Love Is Not Abuse iPhone app that provides information about and warning signs of digital dating abuse. The app is free and literally puts life-saving resources at your fingertips.  Click here to learn more.

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Filed under breast cancer, domestic violence, IVF, molar pregnancy, motherhood, Paranoid Mama, pregnancy

October 17, 2011 · 11:47 pm

Forward and Back

I have a lot to learn about sensory issues, but what I know so far is (1) confidence plays a huge role in achieving success (2) sometimes success requires you to take a few steps back before moving forward.

Saying, “If I eat these strawberries, my eyes will hurt,” or sitting in my lap during a birthday party instead of playing basketball because the noise in the gymnasium is too loud are examples of the backward steps.

Some of the fear and anxiety Dylan feels is because of nervous system confusion.  For example, doing a forward roll sends his vestibular system into a tail spin.  Yes, I just used vestibular in a sentence.  Smart Mama!  A lot of his problems, though, simply have to do with having low muscle tone, and it explains why that t-ball class was so frustrating for him – and the rest of us – last year.

On Friday, I took the boys to a park after school with some friends.  While we were there, Dylan asked me to push him on the baby swing.  It was one of those situations that, before the sensory diagnosis, would have frustrated me to no end.  Why didn’t he want to sit in the big kid swing like his friends?

Truthfully, Dylan hadn’t been near a swing – a baby or big kid one – in a long time.  Somewhere along the way, he decided avoidance was the easiest and least scary solution to the problem, so it was a good thing he wanted to swing at all.

After a few minutes on the baby swing, he did something surprising.  He asked me to push him on a big kid swing, one that was far away from where his friends were playing.  I gladly obliged and a few pushes later, he started pumping his legs forward and back.   It was difficult for him – I could see the strain in his feet when he tried to straighten his legs – but he kept at it.  I sat down on the grass (in awe) and quietly repeated, “Forward and back.  Forward and back.  Forward and back.”

Exciting stuff, right?  Well, it got even better.  After about ten minutes of “practicing,” he told me he wanted to play on the swings with his friends.  And he did just that, confidently pumping his legs forward and back on the big kid swing with a huge smile on his face.  Let me tell you, I was a Proud Mama!  Something big happened in the park that sunny Friday afternoon. Dylan believed in himself and took a colossally gigantically enormously huge step FORWARD.

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Filed under Proud Mama, sensory processing disorder, Smart Mama, Uncategorized