In case you’re wondering how my morning went today, here are some of the zingers I said to my kids before school and the awards I earned for saying them.
Most (Un)Original: “You get what you get and you don’t get upset.”
Most Rhetorical: “Why do we go through this every single morning?”
Most Truthful: “I ask so little of you!”
Most Paranoid: “Why do you treat me this way?”
Most Ridiculous: “You’re lucky you live in this house and not some other house!”
Most Profound: “Sometimes we have to do things we don’t want to do.”
Most Regretful: “Get your shit together!”
Most Desperate: “Why does this have to be so hard?”
Most Aha-Moment Worthy: “None of this is going to change, so you have to change your attitude.”
And my personal favorite…
Most Like Something Lloyd Dobbler Would Say: “Can’t you just be happy? Just decide to be happy and be happy.”
Remember the scene in “Say Anything” when Lloyd Dobbler says to his sister, “Why can’t you be in a good mood? How hard is it to decide to be in a good mood and be in a good mood once in a while?” Thoroughly irritated and with fire in her eyes, she responds, “Gee, it’s easy.”
Just like parenting.
The Runaway Mama by Jen Gregory 