My recent post about guilt (“The Spectrum”) was my most viewed blog post since I began writing almost a year ago. The response was incredible and I was inspired to delve deeper into the topic.
Mamas feel guilt about working – or not working, or working part-time or thinking about working or thinking about not working – but that’s not all. We’re capable of feeling guilt about every decision we make for and every thought we have about our kids from the moment we wake up each morning until our heads hit the pillow each night. There’s big guilt, small guilt, short guilt and long-lasting guilt. Some guilt rolls off easy and some guilt sticks like glue. Some guilt is continuous. Some guilt is temporary. Some guilt is predictable, and some guilt startles us like a slap in the face. Even when we’re guilt-free, we know it’s lurking nearby, waiting to consume us. As Dylan would so eloquently say, that’s stinky.
In “The Spectrum,” I wrote that my guilt feeds my creativity. It’s true. My guilt often gives me good stories to tell and that helps me accept the burden. It’s also true that writing about my guilt simply makes me feel better. So, here goes…
It is officially Guilty Mama Monday! Was there guilt over the weekend? This morning? Are you feeling guilty about the week ahead? Mine hit me like a brick at about 6:45 this morning and it’s sticking like glue.
I’m a Guilty Mama today because…I lost my patience with Riley within an hour of waking up this morning. Maybe it’s because his first wake-up call was at 4:30. His second came at 5:45. When he demanded glue and paint at 6:30, I snapped at him. When we finally made our way to school, he cried the whole way because I buckled his car seat straps too tight. In his classroom, his teachers had to peel him from me crying when I left.
There. I already feel a little bit better. Any other Guilty Mamas out there today?