Category Archives: Uncategorized

November 5, 2010 · 6:50 pm

For The Record

Some conversations were meant to be recorded.

I should begin by telling you that food is an issue in my house, as it probably is in most homes with children under the age of four. Dylan’s fear of fruit and vegetables – and most other foods besides bread, crackers, cheese and yogurt – plays out a lot like a peanut allergy. He’s deathly afraid of any contact.

I’ve learned not to get too frustrated because I’m sure (I hope) he’ll eventually grow out of his food phobias, but I’ve recently put my foot down about fruit. I told him, “The doctor said you have to eat fruit to stay healthy and strong.” For some bizarre reason he believed me, and he’s been eating bananas, apples or applesauce at least once a day. If I ask, “Why do we eat fruit?” he’ll respond, “To stay healthy and strong.” It’s cute. It’s a small step and I’m pleased, but if I could just get him to eat chicken I would sleep a lot better at night.

Every afternoon around 4pm, Dylan and I have the same conversation. I tell him he can’t have any more snacks until after dinner. He tells me he wants popcorn for dinner. I say no and tell him we don’t eat snacks for dinner. Then he says he wants Pirate’s Booty for dinner. And I say no and tell him again that we don’t eat snacks for dinner. Then I offer him a grilled cheese sandwich, macaroni and cheese or something else “dinner-like.”

Anyway, this is how it went yesterday:

Dylan: Why can’t I have more snacks?

Me: Because I want you to have room in your tummy for dinner.

Dylan: Why do we eat dinner?

Me: To stay healthy and strong.

Dylan: But we eat fruit to stay healthy and strong.

Me: Yes, and we eat dinner to stay healthy and strong, too.

Dylan: Why do we eat snacks?

Me: Um, to stay happy, I guess. (What else could I say?)

A few seconds go by.

Dylan: Mommy, I just want to be happy.

How can I argue with that?

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Filed under food, food issues, Uncategorized

October 24, 2010 · 10:47 pm

One Friend

On Friday, Dylan told me he had one special friend at school. He called him his “one friend.” Dylan also told me that he told his friend that he was Dylan’s “one friend,” and the boy responded by telling Dylan that some other kid – not Dylan – was his “one friend.” Ouch.

Dylan didn’t seem upset when he told me this crushing little story. On the contrary, I could actually feel my heart break into a million tiny pieces as I listened, and in a gut-wrenching flash, I saw all of the rejection, loss and heartache my precious little boy will endure in his lifetime. I could barely catch my breath.

We were in the car when Dylan told me the “one friend” story. At a red light, I turned around to evaluate his emotional state (mine was clearly not in a good place), and what I saw was Dylan and Riley holding hands and smiling at each other. From one car seat to the other, they were linked. And laughing.

This image was like magical purple medicine (this is what we call Tylenol in our house). I took a deep breath and told Dylan that Riley would be his best friend forever, no matter what happened anywhere else. He seemed pleased with that, and then he asked me for his snack cup. I guess he was moving on.

After school, Dylan played happily with several kids from his class, including his “one friend” and another little girl, who recently told her mommy she was going to marry either Prince Charming or Dylan when she grows up.

I’m not even going to pretend to understand the relationship dynamics of preschoolers. I just hope it gets easier to help my boys navigate the roller coaster ride of childhood, for their sake and for mine.

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Filed under brothers, motherhood, Uncategorized