Category Archives: motherhood

A Letter To My Dog

Dear Harry,

Happy eighth birthday! In dog years, that makes you forty-five and my wise elder, which suggests that perhaps you should be writing a letter to me. Since you have no opposable thumbs, though, I’ll continue.

harrybday1

It has recently come to my attention that you won’t be here forever. The gray hairs sprouting above your eyes are one clue, but it’s something Riley said a few weeks ago that really got me thinking (and, of course, worrying) about it. He said, “Mommy, when I grow up I will take care of Harry.”

This touching declaration of love and friendship (from an almost four-year-old) made me a very Proud Mama. It also made me cry on and off for the rest of the day because, my Harry-Barry/Bo-Berry/H-to-the-Berry, you won’t be here when Riley is grown up.

I simply want to thank you being in my life.

I’ll never forget how little you were when we first met you.

harrypuppy

For weeks, I feared I would sit on you or roll over on top of you in my sleep (because even though I didn’t want you to sleep in my bed, you weren’t going to have it any other way.)

I’ll always cherish how you instantly loved Dylan when he came into our lives and how you treated him just like a little brother, sibling rivalry and all!

TummyTimeWithHarry

I remember when you slept with your head on my belly when you knew I was pregnant with Riley (before I did), and I’m grateful for the grace with which you welcomed him into our home when you knew full well that it meant you’d receive even less attention (if that was possible).

harrybabyseat

You let me embarrass you.

harrytie

This is from a Father’s Day card photo shoot (from before we had human children and we had nothing better to do than put a neck tie on our dog and force him to pose for pictures).

You let me dress you in a bee costume for Halloween.

Harry the Bee

Year after year after year.

Harry the Bee

Harry the Bee

You even let me put you in an argyle sweater (dry clean only!) once in a while.

harryargyle

(It was cold.)

To say you prepared me for motherhood is an understatement.

You taught me responsibility. After about a week of being your Mama, I secretly wished I could give you back. (Sorry.) Taking care of you was so much harder than I imagined! If it makes you feel any better, now you’re the easy one.

You taught me that love is in the details. Do you know that I can make you fall asleep just by rubbing your front legs?

You taught me fine art of guilt and blame. Shortly after your arrival, I accidentally dropped you headfirst on the concrete of our front walkway. I cried for a week straight.

You also taught me forgiveness. After that terrifying fall, you came back into my arms.

You taught me how to handle a crisis panic. Like the time you had a bone lodged in your throat blocking your breathing and I had to race you to the vet (through two school zones!) to have it removed. Or the time when you ate a rib bone and an x-ray revealed that you had dozens of bone shards traveling through your digestive tract. Or the time when you vomited from anesthesia (when you were neutered) (sorry) and – surprise! – dozens of unchewed, whole Greenies came flying out of your mouth. If it’s true that every family has an “emergency room” kid, you are definitely mine.

The apple certainly doesn’t fall far from the tree. Like me, your skin is sensitive and you suffer from anxiety. And like your brothers, you occasionally torture me with your picky eating (what kind of dog turns down ground beef?) and persnickety personality. Like yesterday when I presented you with your birthday present – a soft, cozy new bed handpicked especially for you – and you weren’t all that impressed.

harrybed3

If you could talk, you would’ve said (just like your brothers), “What else did you get me?”

harrybed2

Still not diggin’ it.

harrybed1

This was just to spite me, right?

Eventually, you embraced it.

harrybed

I think you love it, actually, but I respect your stubbornness. (You get that from me, too.) And at the end of the night, I’m glad you decided to cuddle with Mike and me in our bed, which is exactly where you belong.

Happy Birthday, Harry. Wishing you many, many more!

harrybday

Love,

Your Mama

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Filed under birthday, Harry, motherhood, Proud Mama

One Of Those Days

When my kids are moody and cranky, my motherhood chops are put to the test.   These long, difficult days usually make me contemplate whether to pull out my hair (make the whining stop!) or pat myself on the back (I didn’t hurl them out a window!).

For the most part, the physically hardest bits of parenting are over.  The night feeding, diaper changing, and toddler chasing days are long behind me.  I realize the emotional and psychological torture of child rearing is only just beginning, but it’s a relief to no longer have to hold a crying thirty-pound child in one arm while simultaneously flipping a grilled cheese sandwich and wiping a butt with the other, so let me have this moment, okay?

Even so, at just six and almost four years old, my boys occasionally hold my feet to the fire, and yesterday was one of those days.  From the moment they woke up to the moment before their tired eyes finally closed at bedtime, there was extreme whining; unexpected tantrums; unbearable clinginess; unnecessary (and inappropriate) screaming; countless failed television, toy, and couch negotiations; unwarranted violence, including, but not limited to, pushing, hitting, and headbutting (yes, headbutting); and relentless crying.  Oh the crying!  Even Dylan admits he had “crying-itis” yesterday.  (He made that up all on his own.  I swear.)

There was no school and Mike had an evening work event, so the Crazy was all mine.  All day.  If yesterday were a test, I’m pretty sure I failed miserably, but it was definitely valuable professional development.  And the feeling I had when I finally got the crazy monkeys to sleep was a cocktail of exhaustion, relief, and pride of accomplishment.  It was kind of how I felt when I woke up after my colonoscopy.  (Oh, and I had an actual cocktail, too.)

Thankfully, today was a new day marked more by laughter than anything else.  That, and I went to the theater with my in-laws to see “Agatha Christie’s the BBC Murders” (without the crazy monkeys).

What did you do today?

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Filed under colonoscopy, motherhood, parenting